Collene Borchardt

As an introvert, one of the hardest things for me to do is walk into a crowded room of people I don’t know.   It gives me anxiety just thinking about it.  But when I force myself to do it, I immediately scan the room desperately searching for a familiar face. If I see someone I know, I can relax because I’m not alone.     In the same way, life is a lot easier when we remember God is with us, so we don’t have to face anything alone.   But sometimes this truth is easy to forget.   Especially when life gets hard. When the chaos around us overwhelms us. And the heartache of…

When I was younger, I was deeply involved in a sinful lifestyle. I spent my days seeking happiness in anything but God. I mocked Jesus and made fun of Christians.  I didn’t ask for His forgiveness. And I certainly didn’t deserve it.  But God knew in my darkest moment, that the love of His light was what I needed the most. And it was because He loved me when I least deserved it, that I finally confessed my sin and fell on my knees before Him asking to be forgiven.  But the interesting thing is . . . even after experiencing His amazing grace . . . I still sometimes…

I struggled to fall asleep. The thoughts just wouldn’t stop.  As the memories replayed in my head, my cheeks burned with shame. I buried my face into my pillow, but nothing I did could make the guilt fade away.  Most of the time I can live my life without thinking about those awful moments I regret. And yet, every now and then something happens that reminds me of a part of my story I wish I could erase.  Oh, how I would love to rip those pages right out of the book of my life. And yet no matter how much I try to wish them away . . .…

When my children were younger, we went on a trip as a family and explored some beautiful caves. At one point on our journey, the tour guide told us he was going to shut off the lights so we could experience pure and total darkness.   I wasn’t really sure what to expect but I was in for a bit of a shock.   Because I quickly discovered that total darkness is suffocating. It is disorienting. Lonely. Debilitating. And downright frightening.   We were only in the dark for a few short seconds and yet it felt like an eternity. When our guide turned the lights back on, I immediately felt a sense…

I have not been in the Christmas spirit.   There.   I admitted it.  Christmas is usually my favorite time of year. But I don’t know. This year it feels different.   I turned on the Christmas music. I decorated. We set up the tree and put lights up outside.   But it felt like I was doing it all out of duty. Out of obligation. Just because this is what we do this time of year.  The joy was definitely lacking.   And I didn’t like feeling this way so I began to wonder:  How can I get in the Christmas spirit?  Because if we are honest, we know that being joyful and feeling festive don’t…